Time to fight

The good warrior knows there is time to fight and time to retreat. I am not a good warrior because I fight much more than I retreat. In the war to realize my dreams, I rarely give up my principles and this makes me enter fights that I will obviously lose. However, if you do not give up on fighting you will eventually win and then you will be closer to your goals. Moreover, if your principles are fair, you will probably enter very few fights in which you do not have the weapons to win.

I know some people who are not good warriors either, but not because they fight always. Differently, they always retreat, even when they can certainly win a battle. Their excuse is usually related to the eventual wounds battles make on you (even those that you win). To avoid having to live with the scars, they surrender to the enemy, break their principles, and step away from their dreams. This brings about sadness and depression, which can hurt you way more than battle wounds because they take you from the inside out.

I never really understood this last behavior. In my simple-minded view, if you always fight you might eventually win whereas if you never fight, you will always lose.

And you? Are you a good warrior?

Surpassing problems

Life continues while we are still alive. This sounds silly but sometimes it seems that we forget this fact. When things go wrong, we prefer thinking that the universe is conspiring against us to accepting our situation as an intermediate step in our quest for happiness. We should never give up our dreams due to problems that appear on our way. While alive, we always have power to react to problems, overcome obstacles, and continue our path. As German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche once said: -What doesn't destroy you makes you stronger.

Keep in your mind that everything always ends well. If we are not happy with the outcome of something, it just means that it is not the end yet.

Respecting others

I truly believe somebody's rights end when somebody else's rights start. However, defining a fair boundary is a complicated issue and the source of all conflicts (small and big) we have in society. From a small dispute between neighbors to a big war between countries, it is always a matter of defining the boundary of what one party can do without infringing on the other's rights.

I always believed that people should never do anything to others that they would not like others to do to themselves. This way, the boundary between two people's rights would be implicitly defined and no conflicts would ever happen. Now I know this is not enough.

This idea would only work if we had all the same principles and preferences. Different people are happy or sad with different things and, oftentimes, what makes one happy might make the other sad. Frequently we act based on our thought that we are doing the best to everyone, only to see that some people might not end up happy with the outcome of our initiative. When this happens, we tend to think that it is the others' fault, since they are not able to see what is the best for them according to our perspective of the facts. But who said that our perspective is the right one?

We must do things not based on what we think is the best for everyone but, instead, based on what will not be bad for the others, no matter what their perspective is. In simple words, this means we should respect the different viewpoints people can have and try the best we can not to infringe on their rights.

Live your dreams

Martha always wanted that beautiful and comfortable sofa. It was her dream, no matter how crazy it sounded someone as poor as her saving money to buy an expensive piece of furniture. She waited more than one year, saving all the money she could in order to buy it. Every week that passed, she fed her dream by standing outside the furniture store and staring at her desired item. Sometimes she would enter the shop and pretend she had the money to buy it right away.

She was extremely happy the day she had all the money to buy it. However, when she got the sofa delivered at home, happiness gave place to fear. She was afraid of damaging her most precious asset, the one thing that took her so much effort to acquire. At that moment, she decided she would not use it and placed her old wooden chairs around her living room for people to sit on. Nobody was allowed to sit on the sofa, not even her. The years passed and when she was finally able to overcome her fear, the sofa had been severely damaged by termites.

We should cherish our dreams after they become reality and we must not be afraid of destroying them. Nothing lasts forever and, should something bad happen, it is better to destroy a dream we have lived at least for a moment than not being able to live a dream at all.

Am I a Robot?

"Am I a robot?"

I think this is an interesting question to ask ourselves when analyzing whether we are happy with the life we have lived so far. It is an abstract question, though, and one might say that robots can become as complex as human beings in the future (or even more complex than). However, I am talking about simpler robots, incapable of dreaming, creating new things, and changing the course of their lives. I usually make this analysis based on four simpler questions:

1. How much of what I do are simple responses to events that have happened ?

If you just react to what happens around you, you will never be able to create new things and drive your own life.

2. How much of my behavior was imposed by the rest of the world ?

Disseminating knowledge and experience is paramount for our progress. But does someone really have free will if everything she or he does was imposed by others. You should always know the purpose of the actions you take and relate them to your goals in life. An action whose purpose does not match your goals is not worth taking.

3. How distant are my long term dreams from my current reality?

If you dream about something you already have, is it really a dream? You should always dream about your biggest realizations because you will only have one opportunity to achieve them in this life.

4. How much has my life changed lately?

Even if you have wonderful dreams about your long term future, if you do not steer your life toward achieving them, they will never become reality. You should not be afraid of achieving your goals because that was the reason you created them. By the time you achieve something, you will have already defined further goals to achieve afterwards, and that's what makes life the great adventure it is.

I remember several periods of my life in which I behaved like a robot. Being able to realize the problem and changing the situation is what makes us human beings. You can always change your life, unless you are really a robot.

On social behavior

I read the following post on Paulo Coelho's Blog this morning:

Virtue that offends

Abbot Pastor was out walking with a monk from Sceta when they were invited to a meal. The owner of the house, honoured by the monks’ presence, ordered that only the very best of everything should be served.

However, the monk was in the middle of a period of fasting, and when the food arrived, he took a single pea and chewed it very slowly. He ate only that one pea during the whole of supper.

As they were leaving, the Abbot said to him:

‘Brother, when you go to visit someone, do not make of your sanctity an insult. The next time you are fasting simply decline any invitations to supper.’

The monk understood what the Abbot meant. From then on, whenever he was with other people, he did as they did.

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It got me thinking on social behavior.

As the story shows, one's ideas and habits can pretty much offend surrounding people. I learned by experience how important it is to be careful about our actions when dealing with other people. However, it is not as easy as it seems to be.

Many people are oblivious to the others' feelings and behave as if whoever interacts with them should adapt himself to their comportment. On the other hand, I have also seen many people who care too much about the others around them and have lost their individuality. They basically never do what they want or what they like. They live unhappy lives trying to satisfy everyone around them, which is obviously impossible.

We must know how to balance our behavior to make sure we do not hurt the others at the same time that we keep our free will.

--
Greg